it’s a different city

with you gone

everywhere is coded

with the lack of you

i saw more

i watched for

did not participate

in any tableau of death

and now i feel it

i panic

now i dread

though i still adore

diagonal sleet

i hope this is

some cinematic image

seeing from the J train

an inch of perfect snow

this would be a good place

to make a film

about new york

about the difference

between the platforms

where we stood

and where we never stood together

in a cold winter sun

someone regrets every station

thousands of cameras

record grieving faces

in the same light

the same wind off the harbor

as nine Decembers ago